Why He Didn’t Ask You On a Second Date

In my work with male clients, it still surprises me when I hear the array of horrific dating don’ts that are innocently committed by the most beautiful, educated and seemingly “perfect” women.

The results are tragic, and I feel quite confident that most of these women have no idea why they are not being asked on date number two, or are ultimately not pursued after the red flags are hoisted, flown and dominate the country of potential relationship. What’s most important for you to know is that while you may say you would “never “ do these things, there are a host of small, minute “errors” that send men running for the hills in their Nikes.

What follows are my top three unconscious dating mistakes made by some of the most beautiful, smart and “together” women who walk unwittingly through the dating jungle:

1. The Medical “Overshare”

It may seem so innocent to share your medical history on a date, especially when the conversation merely started over your choice to say “no” to the gourmet macaroni and cheese your date offers you over the dinner table. However, it is not in your best interest to share your genetic disposition to high cholesterol, pull out the herbal tea you are drinking to cope with menstrual cramps, or even mention your brief experimentation with anti-anxiety medication to get through the recent death of the grandmother who practically raised you that is the reason you keep yawning over dessert.

While these facts do not indicate whether or not your values may match the man with whom you are having these conversations, the truth is that because he asked you out and chose to spend time with you, he may hear these conversational tidbits and fleetingly wonder if your children would have high cholesterol or be prone to anxiety. Although I urge both men and women to simply enjoy a date without the pressure of “is this the one’ mentality and have a “human experience,” it is natural and normal for a man (or woman) to raise an ear to a piece of information that could be a potential red flag.

Ingredient Spotlight: The Health Benefits of Chamomile

Have you had your chamomile today? If you haven’t, you may be missing out on one of nature’s most powerful healers!

In Germany, chamomile is known as the “cure-all cure”. While most of us are familiar with the relaxing properties of chamomile, the herb has been used since ancient times to treat a wide range of symptoms. Chamomile is known to boost the immune system, maintain blood pressure within the normal range, and eliminate bad bacteria found in the body. It is also a natural pain reliever.

The active constituents found in chamomile have anti-inflammatory and anti-bacterial properties. It can be used on wounds to promote healing, on swollen gums, and even to soothe diaper rash in babies. Chamomile also contains coumarin, a compound that has blood-thinning effects.  The homeopathic version of chamomile, known as “Chamomilla,” is also used for a number of ailments. In children, Chamomilla is used for those prone to tantrums, for babies undergoing teething and who experience irritability, diarrhea and pain, colic, and for earaches.  For women, it may be used to alleviate breast tenderness, menstrual cramps, and other common symptoms of PMS.

Both the herbal and the homeopathic versions have nerve-soothing properties, which help relieve anxiety and stress. This can be a life saver during the holidays when stress is experienced by so many. Many times, stress is responsible for seasonal weight gain. This can be due to a break in routines, where exercise is sometimes neglected, and along with emotional eating related to stress. Chamomile not only soothes the nerves, it has also been used since ancient times to treat digestion and stomach complaints. Combined with ginger, it is an excellent tonic for the entire digestive system and the immune system.